How Kids will Kill your Career and How you can Survive

We live in a world where women have become empowered and are relentlessly pursuing their career opportunities. So it very common for women who are choosing career over mother hood or having kids.

Others are delaying having children in order to further their career. Women are choosing to reach a predefined point in their career before they are willing to have kids because they know once they have kids they will have to balance both their career and kids.

And when they do, moms are choosing to stick to the minimum i.e. one or two kids. Studies have found that the average career woman is giving birth to two kids to allow them focus on their career. Three or more kids are definitely too many for a career woman.

Women are choosing not to or delaying giving birth because of how it affects their career such as losing focus, mother penalty, losing earning potential and reduced productivity. Some women have had their kids kill their career because they could not find a balance.

However you can manage to thrive in your career and over these challenges by finding a supportive partner/system , reliable childcare, supportive employer/workplace and a resilient mindset.

How Many Kids are Enough for Career Women

There is definitely a correlation between career success and number of children a woman has. The more kids you have, the more your career will be impacted. You may notice your career stalling if have multiple kids. You career will definitely die if you have more than two kids who are demand your attention.

If you intend to pursue and have a thriving career as a women, only have one or two kids or avoid motherhood altogether.This is the reason why the most accomplished and successful corporate women in top leadership and management tend to have one kid or two at most- in rare cases.

Read: Best Mom-Friendly Careers

Impact of Babies on Women Career

1. Professional Roles Conflicts with Motherhood

Because of the roles expectations on the woman from the society, there is a conflict with the professional roles. Women are expected to prioritize motherhood more which affects their career goals and priorities.

Instead of fully focusing on career, moms are required to share the time and energy with the mental and physical load of child rearing and household care. As a result your career may die if you choose motherhood.

How Many Kids Delay or Kill Women's Career

2. Focus & Priorities Shift from Work to Kids

Kids demand time, energy and attention from the parent. Naturally the focus and time you give your career will shift to your kids. The more children you have, the more negatively your career will be affected because you now have less time and energy for work.

Each child will have different and independent demands during each developmental age.  if you have two kids or more, you will find this too overwhelming to concentrate on career and parenting multiple kids at the same time. 

Read: How A Small Gap Between Children Affects Women Career

3.Unreliable Childcare affects Women Productivity

Finding a reliable, convenient and affordable childcare solution is the major challenge for many working moms.  The inability to consistently get a reliable childcare will affect your work productivity because you are either too distracted or have to miss work so that you can care for your kids. As a result the more kids you have, the more impact your career will face.

You may want to read How Single Moms Afford the High Daycare Costs

4. Fewer Opportunities for Career Growth

When you have children, the chances of growing in your career either through education or promotions go lower. The high mental load from balancing kids and work takes away time & effort that you let everything else go. Also you may face too many challenges when you want to advance your education such as cost and childcare.

Moms careers die because you become less eligible for career opportunities such as promotions because of maternity leave breaks and being unavailable. Further motherhood will reduce your ability of earning better. I personally lost a well paying promotion because i was due for maternity leave.

why Many Kids Delay or Kill Women's Career

5. Burnout affects Productivity and Performance

Most working moms with multiple kids report the highest cases of fatigue and burnout. It is just too much juggling being a parent and having a high-level career.

Eventually you find your work performance deteriorating and equally your career start to stall. The poor performance will even stop you from advancing to top leadership roles or getting promotions.

Read: How to Avoid/Recover from Burnout

Read: Why Working Moms Hate Work after Getting Babies

Tips on Having Kids and Thriving in Career

1. Create a Support System

If you intend to pursue your career as a mother, you need to surround yourself with people who supports your goal and are willing to give you the necessary help. Your partner, family and friends are all important for you if you are planning to give birth and still go after your career.

The support system will offer financial, moral and childcare help so that you have time and energy to focus on your work that your career needs to grow. They also offer a platform for you to discuss, brainstorm and address your career challenges. You can succeed in your career as a mother as long you can get all the help you need.

2. Get Reliable Childcare

It will be impossible for you to be productive in your career if you do not have a reliable person looking after your kids. You need a plan that allow you to get adequate time that you can focus on work without worrying over your child.

A good reliable option would be a live in nanny as it offers you round the work child care especially for when you need to work odd hours on your career. The reliability will ensures that kids do not ruin your career by being too demanding.

3. Have Fewer kids to get Work-Life Balance

While working moms generally have challenges in attaining a work life balance, moms with multiple kids have it worse. For this reason, you need to limit the number of kids if you want to give your career a chance to thrive. If you want to prevent kids from ruining your career, then have fewer kids.

The more kids you have, the more time and attention they will take from you away from your career. Stick to either one or two to give you enough work life balance so that you give your career adequate time and attention. You may even choose not to have kids at all because you want your career to remain unaffected.

4. Adopt a Self-Care Routine

Above everything else, you need to take care of yourself. Self-care will help you prevent the mother from negatively affecting your career.

You need to give your body the necessary nutrients for energy through a well balanced diet. You need to get quality 8 hours of sleep everyday. Also aim for about 30 minutes of exercising everyday.

Also focus on own self needs, your likes hobbies and new skills you want to learn. Further make time to connect with nature and socially with friends.

Incorporate all these into your daily routine and you will notice both your physical and mental health improving. Subsequently you will have adequate energy for both your kids and also your career.

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